One year mark

That day changed my life forever. The part that pains me the most is I never had the chance to tell my mother one last time that i loved her an that one day I would make her proud of what I will accomplish in life. Everyday is a new reminder that I have lost my mother. Some days are good, some days are bad.

Unfortunately, life will never be the same again and this is something we must all accept. And I am sure if my mom is watching over us then she would not want us to be upset about her passing. By far this is the best way to die. My wish is that the day my time comes that I pass the same way.

My mother loved everyone with all of heart, this is one thing that amazed me. That even when people would befriend her she would still be there whenever they needed her. My mother had an unconditional love with everyone. I am so thankful that I blessed with such a mother. When I think of my mom there are tons and tons of memories that float around my mind but what I truly miss the most is my mom waiting for me when I walk through the door.

Unfortunately I will never find the same kind of love or appreciation that my mother had for me, but I will always cherish the affection and undemanding love my mother showed to me. I am not certain about any afterlife but this I am certain of, if there is one then my mother is in the highest of heavens that God has to offer.

Let this be a lesson to all of us that life changes within a blink of an eye. We all take it for granted but, I have changed my outlook on life entirely since this catastrophic event. It breaks my heart that I learned this harsh lesson from the loss of my mother but such is life.

jate hue kahte ho qiyamat ko milen ge kya khub! qiyamat ka hai goya koi din aur. (leaving me, you say that we shall meet on the day of resurrection, how nice! is this a day other than the doomsday?)

tum kaun se the aise khare dad-o-sitad ke, karta malakulmaut taqaza koi din aur. (you were not so straightforward in your dealings to the angel of death, you could have negotiated for a few days more).

You may be king of the land, but I am king of the pen

Unfortunately it is in our nature to be apathetic to state of affairs that occur in our daily life that we encounter, for instance homeless man standing the street. Typically we pay no mind to them, our mind plays different scenarios on how that person who could be out earning money instead of begging on the side of the street. We find reasons to justify our decisions and actions day in and day out. Yes human beings are selfish by nature I cannot and will not deny that fact, but I do believe that we can be more compassionate with our fellow comrades who face the same troubles as we do more or less. Another ill-fated decision we make in our life is how we treat our loved ones. Loved ones seem to always be pushed to the side even though they should be our first priority. Life changes in a split second, ask me I was faced with the cold reality not too long ago. Love others as you would love yourself. We all have our own ambitions and desires, some more aggressive than others but what are we achieving? Self-preservation?  We are slaves to our own demise. Eventually we all will perish and just a memory of you will be left. Are the memories people have of you now something to be cherished? We have the rest of our lives to become rich, become on the front page of entrepreneur magazine or the fortune 500 magazine. As much as we would like to think we have plenty of time on our hands, making plans in the future, what are we doing for our present? Are we making our loved ones happy? What have we done to better serve our community? Personally my salvation lies within the people near and dear to me. I would like to consider myself a friend to a friend, but unfortunately people take my kindness for weakness. At the end of the day that I know who I am, I cannot please the world and like I have said previously my intent is not to do so. Not everyone has ill intentions so it’s better that you give them the benefit of the doubt before you judge their character.

We decide our fate, make it the right choice. We all take different highways to reach our nirvana, at the end our destination is the same. Don’t be so judgmental. Grow up and quit your unconventional stone written rules and regulations. Living in fear will not leave you content with life. The point is to fall in a love trance, then fear of punishment. I have never been one for conventional reasoning nor do I find it healthy to my existence to do so.


“Let the beauty you love be what you do, there a thousand ways to kneel and kiss the earth”


Salvation lies within YOU

Play the hand your dealt like its 4 aces

I had a conversation with a friend the other day and we touched on various topics, the one that intrigued me the most was when we were talking about goals and aspirations and the obstacles people face when trying to achieve them. He said “play the hand you are dealt like its 4 aces,” for those of you who are unfamiliar with the poker lingo. 4 aces is one of the strongest hands you can have in Texas Hold-em. Turns out I stumbled across a poker tournament yesterday and decided to sit down. In poker, the cards you are dealt is luck, but it is how you apply them to get your winnings. There were several times where I had cards that are considered untouchable in the game because you can’t really make anything out of them. But I applied his theory and overcome people with very strong hands by how aggressively I was moving with them. The same goes for your life.

We are not always given things on a silver platter, but given the right principles and attitude you can change your direction and give yourself the bigger and better things in life. We all have different goals and aspirations, but what makes us different from the rest of the lot is how uncompromisingly we strive to achieve them. If you have the mentality the heavens are falling and there is no hope for you, sadly enough this will be your demise. In the very short years that I have been able to comprehend and assess the different life patterns and why people thrive more than others, I have come to realize it is all your mind set. We all have heard fairy tale stories of rags to riches or someone getting lucky and striking gold. The only difference between them and us is their persistence to achieve their beloved dreams. Every week I make a list of targets that I need to achieve, at the end of the week if my goal has not been achieved, it was a waste of a week. This is our future, like it is said in the movie Scarface “The world is yours,” it truly is my friends.


This world is what we make of it, don’t get it twisted.

I am not only talking about monetary wealth, it could be a spiritual enlightenment or a new hobby you are trying to excel in. Every aspect in life should be treated the same, whether it comes to family or a new job. Strive for the best, set your standards high. If you set the bar high and you don’t reach that point, you will still be damn well near it. Its unfortunate and it breaks my heart when I see young kids throwing their life away over senseless garbage. At the end of the day I am not out to change the world, but if I can do my part to aid someone in changing their methods to their madness for the better then I feel like I would not have wasted this life.

Go and do likewise, if you don’t I have no remorse for you.

Be well, do good, pay your taxes, and call me if you need an accountant ;)

“No man can reveal to you nothing but that which already lies half-asleep in the dawning of your knowledge.”

The Awakening

We come across all sorts of people in life, from childhood till now the people you have encountered changed your life in some way. Whether it is good or bad is determined by your own thought process. A life full of regret is a life wasted. We do not always know how far the ripples of our actions go but we should always strive in bettering ourselves and the people around us. Therefore, when you are a friend to someone in my opinion, you should do it whole heartedly. My definition of a friend is an individual who is a well wisher who is there in times of misfortune, and contentment. Unfortunately, we cannot build expectations in people because of their devious nature. Although, I generally give people the benefit of the doubt. Given the opportunity I still would not alter the past. I live my life with no regrets and what happens truly does happen for the best.

The grass is greener on the side YOU want it to be.

Day and day out we are subject to routine, like drones we go to work come back home and indulge ourselves in some activity which is most likely not bettering ourselves, or the people around us. I have made a bucket list in the previous post, if anyone would like to join me on the things to do list let me know, I would like to do something out of the norm for a change. The knowledge is out there but we choose not to take it. Some may argue they have responsibilities at home or their schedule is in such a way they cannot make time for gaining knowledge or lending a helping hand. I beg to differ. On average (assumption) it typically takes 20 minutes in Houston for you to travel from point A to point B. During that time you can get an audio cd and listen to a book you have wanted to read, or hey here’s a thought: how about we use the radio to listen to the news? So many bright young minds go to waste on senseless garbage. Don’t get me wrong I am not genius, nor anywhere near it. But I like to stay informed and try to better myself everyday in some form. A day without acquiring new knowledge is a day wasted. On a weekend you can spend 1-2 hours whatever time you have available to help out at an animal shelter or an old folks home. Periodically I go and volunteer at these places because they are in dire need of help. Those of you who are reading this are most likely the future of this country. How are we supposed to turn this place into a paradise if we are destroying our roots and the very foundation we were brought up on? No I am not some mentally distraught person talking out of a bong of smoke haze. Now is the time to better ourselves before it is too late. Me and a few of my friends have started a book club, if you are interested in joining you are more than welcome to. All we require is a sound mind with the ability to accept others opinions. The road to perdition is exceedingly accessible when the mind has already accepted the downward spiral of self destruction. At the end of the day you can lie to the world but you are only cheating yourself. Do good to yourself and unto others.

“Live simply. Love generously. Care deeply. Speak kindly. Leave the rest to God”

Until next time my friends, may the tides of happiness flow with you always.

My Bucket List

Visit:

1. Bora Bora
2. Italy
3. Greece
4. India
5. Prague
6. Venice

Things to do:

1. Reach Million Miler Status through Continental
2. Bungee Jump
3. Learn how to sail---Just bought a 2 hour lesson!
4. Play tennis with Roger Federer/ Pete Sampras
5. Go snowboarding/ ride sand dunes
6. Become fluent in spanish, russian, farsi, italian
7. Learn to play piano, harmonica, sitar, harmonium
8. Conduct a orchestra
9. Design a floor plan for a house
10. Learn ballroom dancing, waltz, tap dancing, tango, square dancing
11. Swim with sharks
12. Dive in a submarine
13. Go snorkeling in a ship wreck
14. Ride in a hot air balloon
15. Parasailing
16. Helicopter ride
17. Ride a zip line through the Amazon
18. Go to the moon
19. Learn archery
20. Break a Guiness world record
21. Go to London for breakfast, Switzerland for lunch, italy for dinner
22. Raise a lion cub
23. Learn to paint
24. Grow prize winning flowers
25. Become a steak connoisseur
26. Read every Jalalluddin Rumi poem
27. Own every track that Nusrat Fateh Ali Khan sang
28. Win a Nobel prize
29. Write an article in the New York Times
30. Own an island
31. Own a vast art collection
32. Invent something
33. Open a Swiss bank account
34. See a platypus
35. Go to a Broadway play
36. Throw a first pitch in a major league baseball game

People I would like to meet:

1. Warren Buffet
2. Bill Clinton
3. Robert De Niro
4. Joe Pesci
5. Roger Federer
6. Jack Nicholson
7. Muhammad Ali

That's all i can think of for now. ciao

How can I feel nostalgia for a world I never knew?

Jalaluddin Rumi

The Story of My Life

i was ready to tell
the story of my life
but the ripple of tears
and the agony of my heart
wouldn't let me
i began to stutter
saying a word here and there
and all along i felt
as tender as a crystal
ready to be shattered
in this stormy sea
we call life
all the big ships
come apart
board by board
how can i survive
riding a lonely
little boat
with no oars
and no arms
my boat did finally break
by the waves
and i broke free
as i tied myself
to a single board
though the panic is gone
i am now offended
why should i be so helpless
rising with one wave
and falling with the next
i don't know
if i am
nonexistence
while i exist
but i know for sure
when i am
i am not
but
when i am not
then i am
now how can i be
a skeptic
about the
resurrection and
coming to life again
since in this world
i have many times
like my own imagination
died and
been born again
that is why
after a long agonizing life
as a hunter
i finally let go and got
hunted down and became free.



Wandering from place to place, in search of something more.  Will this lust ever finish or will it keep growing as I do, or will it finish with me? That's the irony; it would not even finish then. If i die tomorrow it would remain with me, you see it's inbuilt.


"I am the lost human heart, imprisoned the foul dungeon of man's dictates, tied with chains of earthly authority, dead and forgotten by laughing humanity whos tongue is tied and whose eyes are empty of visible tears."


I would like to think of myself as an optimist in a world filled with adversity and depraved of uncerntainty. With belief in the supreme architect of the universe. Until next time folks, be cool.

My Mother

I wrote this a while back about my mom, I should probably reword this but this is how it poured out and that's how it is gonna be.

Some people believe God is a super natural being, or in the form of a statue, for me my mother had the same attributes as what we believe God is. My mother was a remarkable and exceptional person. She had kindness that no one could understand. It still baffles me how she treated everyone as if they were her own. If anyone of us was gloomy she would bend over backwards to bring a smile back to our face. I remember that when I would be sad or upset my mother would sit by my side and make the tears go away. My mother couldn’t sleep until we were in the house, and I used to get upset that she would ruin her sleep just to make sure I get home safe, now these are the memories I miss the most. The most painful part of my day is looking down at my phone and not seeing a call from my mother to see where I am, how my day is going, or when am I coming home. Also walking through the front door every day and not seeing her praying namaz, or waiting for me at the dinner table. My mother had always taught me to be a kind hearted, humble person, and to always strive for excellence.

Now we must all go through our lives and live how she would have wanted us to live. Although the pain of the separation from my beloved mother will never leave me, I have learned from this experience that life truly cannot be taken for granted. Cherish every moment you have with your loved ones, this should be a great illustration of how quickly we can leave this world without a sign. What we must understand also is that this was God’s will and we cannot turn back the clock and bring her back. My mother will always be the noor of my eyes, and the teachings she has raised me and Michelle with will live forever with us and our children to come. Everyday has become a reminder for me to go on with my life with my head held up high and become what my mother wished for me to be. I find peace in knowing the way she passed there is truly no better way to leave this materialistic world.

A mother’s love, is always patient and understanding; while others would forsake us in times of adversity. My mother truly was an angel in human form.  Her heart was a deep abyss which was filled with love and forgiveness. Although she has left us in the middle of the road, I am certain that God had better plans for her, and that she is still with me. Every action I take, I think how my mom would feel. When mom died I was given some great advice from one of the partners in my firm: “Everything you do in life, remember your mother. Your mother will always watch over you no matter where she is, although she is not physically here that doesn’t mean that she loves you any less or that she is not behind you to catch you when you fall. Every success in life that you have is because of your mother. Therefore do not be sad that she has left you, because she is still here in spirit.”

My mother’s love is a never ending symphony that plays in my head. How this time has passed for me is indescribable, and only someone who has lost their mother can understand this pain. I hope and pray that one day when I leave this world that I will be reunited with my mother.